candykiller: (Default)
my phone decided to have an adventure. while i was washing laundry, it jumped into the washing machine; and i did not see this. little bastard. he toured the spin cycle, the soapy wash cycle, and the rinse cycle. i found him laying in a pool of water as i pulled out the fresh clean clothes and began to dry them.

long story short, i now have a new phone. i'm at the same number, however, if i had yours and you'd like me to continue to call i suggest you leave it, call me, or get your number to me in some other way soon.

motherfucking sprint.

an added fun bonus, the phone i bought was refurbished, and whoever had it before me was fucking crazy. some of the ringers that were dled into the phone...OH MAN.
candykiller: (Default)
dear snoopy mcfatherpants

r u reading this?! lyke of course you are!

snooping is hard work, so i just wanted to save you some time.

a)i dont really have any jobs. when i say i'm working, i'm meeting up with random people i meet online for some really hot smex.

b)when we're not meeting up for hot smex, i'm looking at pr0n.

really, i'm not sure why no one's contacted you about my truck? b/c i obviously can't make payments on it if i'm not working.

c) and are my favorite two websites. i own everything they sell.

d)i never go to school, i take kung fu lessons with that guy who's the bad guy in that one jackie chan movie.

e)there's a secret stash of mallomars under my bed. SRSLY. LYKE, DUDE.

f)i break into your room and move things.
just because.

g)if you haven't realized how silly you are for snooping by now, god do i pity you.
candykiller: (Default)
this entry is public, so i only have to say it once.

i am writing a novel this month. this is the most important thing to me, ever. i am getting my shit together and doing something i have always wanted to do, using nanowrimo to get my lazy butt motivated. i WILL follow this through to the end.

you don't have to appreciate that, or even understand it. but don't come bitching to me about how i'm wasting my time. i don't want to hear it. i will promptly tell you to go fuck yourself. so just stop it. anything more from you people and you will be blocked from my phone, aim/msn, etc, until...whenever you decide to stop being a jackass.
candykiller: (Default)
Yappy Hambam (12:31:31 AM): you're a fag, then
puppy poacher (12:31:41 AM): I'MMA CIGARETTE, SCORE
Yappy Hambam (12:31:49 AM): .....
Yappy Hambam (12:31:50 AM): sure you are.
puppy poacher (12:31:54 AM): lol
Yappy Hambam (12:32:25 AM): tall, with a butt on the end, and a smoking top....and chock full of death-bits

enid11483 (7:31:06 PM): looks like they're a few noodles short of a ramen bowl

puppy poacher (8:46:37 PM): i would have his babies if i didn't think babies were toxic little monsters that need to be destroyed


candykiller: (Default)

October 2011

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